Written by: Erik Hagen
And now, here is today’s update in Pretty People Problems.
Jon Hamm, better known as Don Draper on AMC’s Mad Men and/or the guy who is almost constantly hosting Saturday Night Live, in an interview to be published in next month’s issue of Elle K, referred to famous-for-being-famous people Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton (You remember Paris Hilton, right? Anyone? Paris Hilton? 2005?) as “(expletive) idiots.”
And when I say “(expletive) idiots,” I don’t mean that he said the word “expletive.” He used one, and a very awesome one which I also enjoy using, but choose not to in this medium because it seems like the professional thing to do.
“Whether it’s Kim Kardashian or Paris Hilton or whoever, stupidity is certainly celebrated.” said Hamm. “Being a (expletive) idiot is a valuable commodity in this culture because you’re rewarded significantly.”
So that was fun, right? I mean, we can all agree with the point that Jon Hamm is making: In the turgid reality that we all currently inhabit, most of the things that are popular on a wide scale are, in fact, mind-numbingly stupid?
I don’t really see how anyone can disagree with that. American Idol, that’s still popular. Case in point.
But no, I guess this is something that we need to have a discussion about because Jon Hamm was totally mean and unfair to stupid Kim Kardashian, who is in no way whatsoever celebrated for being stupid. So Kim Kardashian was forced to fire back a response to Jon Hamm, which she of course did on Twitter. And it went like this:
“Calling someone who runs their own businesses, is a part of a successful TV show, produces, writes, designs, and creates, “stupid,” is in my opinion careless,” Kardashian tweeted.
Paraphrase: “I’m Kim Kardashian, and I’m stupid. Durr durr durr.”
OK, fine. To be fair, that’s an accurate paraphrase for everything Kim Kardashian has ever said. But also, please shut the hell up, Kim Kardashian. It’s ridiculous to be of the opinion that it’s somehow impossible for someone who “is a part of a successful TV show, produces, writes, designs and creates” to be, in any way, stupid.
Hey, um, you know who else does all those things? Snooki. Also, everyone else on Jersey Shore. Also, also, pretty much everyone else famous in Hollywood. So your point is that there are no stupid people in Hollywood? Good point, Kim Kardashian. Good point.
Here’s the thing. A common mistake made by stupid people is the belief that you can’t possibly be considered stupid if you are successful. That is why the Transformers movies were not at all stupid because of all the money that they made. That’s why FOX News is not at all stupid because it has so many people watching it. That is why the Twilight books are not at all stupid because of all the books they’ve sold. In effect, anything and everything that is popular is not stupid, because it is successful.
However, I’m going to argue that most things that are successful and popular are so because they are stupid, because smart things only cater to smart people, whereas stupid things cater to everybody. And that was Jon Hamm’s entire point. Our culture celebrates stupidity.
So anyway, despite being in every way correct and everything, Jon Hamm still had to kind of apologize by telling E! (which is also very popular, and also very, very stupid) that “What I said was meant to be more on the pervasiveness of something in our culture, not personal, but she took offense to it and that is her right.”
And that is where we are today, where Jon Hamm was forced to apologize to Kim Kardashian for calling her a “(expletive) idiot” in spite of the fact that Kim Kardashian is quite obviously an “(expletive) idiot.” But just to show you why this is such an injustice, I will explain with the following helpful infographic:
Jon Hamm Kim Kardashian
Talented Untalented
Famous More Famous
On “Mad Men” On “Keeping Up With the Kardashians”
Awesome Not Awesome
There you go. Jon Hamm should never have to apologize to Kim Kardashian for anything, because she is terrible and he is not. And thus concludes another edition of Pretty People Problems. Tune in next time, when more people with looks and money decide to get angry with one another.
Bismarck resident Erik Hagen is the author of the SodBlog and, were he a smarter man, would stay out of these stupid kerfuffles, but chooses to engage because it allows him to use the word “kerfuffle.” Send your guesses on what the (expletive) was to or visit his website at sodblog.com.
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